If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by, you might live in Minnesota.
If you’re proud that your state makes the national news 96 nights each year because International Falls (like Siberia) is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Minnesota.
If you have ever refused to buy something because it’s “too spendy”, you might live in Minnesota.
If your local Dairy Queen (ice cream) is closed from November through March, you might live in Minnesota.
If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don’t work there, you might live in Minnesota.
If your dad’s suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his forehead, you might live in Minnesota.
If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Minnesota.
If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Minnesota.
If you know how to say Wayzata, Mahtomedi, Edina and Shakopee, you might live in Minnesota.
If you think that ketchup is a little too spicy, you might live in Minnesota.
If the word, “Vacation” means going up north past Brainerd for the weekend. You might live in Minnesota.
If you measure distance in hours, you might live in Minnesota.
If you know several people who have hit deer more than once, you might live in Minnesota.
If you often switch from “heat” to “A/C” in the same day and back again, you might live in Minnesota.
If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching, you might live in Minnesota.
If you see people wearing hunting clothes at social events, you might live in Minnesota.
If you install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, you might live in Minnesota.
If you think of the major food groups as beer, fish, and venison, you might live in Minnesota.
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them, you might live in Minnesota.
If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Mill’s Fleet Farm at any given time, you might live in Minnesota.
If you design your kid’s Halloween (31 October) costume to fit over a snowsuit you might live in Minnesota.
If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow you might live in Minnesota.
If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction you might live in Minnesota.
If you can identify a southern or eastern accent you might live in Minnesota.
If you consider Minneapolis exotic, you might live in Minnesota.
If your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce, you might live in Minnesota.
If down south to you means Iowa, you might live in Minnesota.
If a brat (bratwurst) is something you eat, you might live in Minnesota.
If you go out to fish fry every Friday, you might live in Minnesota.
If you find 0 degrees F (about -10 C?) “a little chilly” you might live in Minnesota.
If you actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Minnesota friends, you might live in Minnesota!
And our recent additions:
If you have given a lady friend or relative a pair of Santa Claus-styled shotgun shell earrings for Christmas, you might live in Minnesota.
If you like winters but think summers are too short, you might live in Minnesota
If you reluctantly find yourself enjoying yard Christmas decorations, you might live in Minnesota.
If you find yourself politely ignoring yard Christmas decorations you see left up for most of the year, you might live in Minnesota.
If you have a snow shovel in the trunk of your car, you might live in Minnesota.
Thanks to Angela for the tips!
(Photo taken in front of the Journal of American Rocket Science Headquarters)
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