I’ve been dating a girl for several weeks, and things are going well; we have fun together. There’s this thing, though, that kind of sketches me out: she likes to watch me shower. Not like in an erotic way, exactly…that happens too, but that’s different. I mean she likes to just watch me plain old shower, and then she sits in the bathroom and watches me shave. She doesn’t talk or anything; she just watches. Is that weird?
That does sound kind of weird, especially the not talking and it not (seeming) erotic (at least to you). Are you sure she isn’t getting off on watching you in her mind, imprinting the image of you for her fantasies? I take it you asked her and didn’t get much of a response, or you wouldn’t be writing me.
I would say that if this makes you feel really self-conscious or it feels too weird or invasive of your privacy, just be direct and tell her you need privacy; being watched isn’t a turn-on for you. If she seems put out by this, tell you need to know why she does this. She must have a reason, even if it’s as simple as enjoying reveling in looking at your gorgeous bod from afar, while you’re involved in a daily ritual. I think the reason women like to hang out in the bathroom with their man is in a sense it’s intimate, in a quiet, low-key way—the not talking, again, is weird, but maybe she’s just enjoying the hang-out in a daydreamy way. So, you have to decide, since you have fun and things are going well outside the bathroom, if you can tolerate her watching or not, and close the bathroom off to her or no. But it doesn’t sound creepy enough that I would worry about it.