They slapped the set on the stage
Oh, they slapped that set on the stage
This looks like a set made with minimum wage
And my neighbor says “Jerry Lee” like he’s 10x my age
They slapped the set on the stage
Why can’t I see Jerry Lee Lewis’ face?
I said why can’t I see Jerry Lee Lewis’ face?
The staging made him seem a little outta place
Till those fingers got the piano keys in pace’
Now I get why I can’t see Jerry’s face.
Southern drawls make me pine for some ribs
Yes, Southern drawls make me pine for some ribs
Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives when Carl Perkins arrives
Derek Keeling as Cash got me callin’ dibs
Southern drawls make me pine for some ribs
As if I wasn’t already thinkin’ bout BBQ,
A fellow named Slaughter made Elvis carry through,
I couldn’t hate him completely, sang “Peace In The Valley” too sweetly,
Yes, Perkins felt slighted, black artists did too,
But that fellow named Slaughter carried Elvis through.
Lying there as that ‘ol blues overwhelms,
But Grant as Sam Phillips looks like Ed Helmes,
Tell the agent to suck it, he just fell in the “luck bucket”,
At least the rest of the cast sings the songs,
Lying there as that ‘ol blues overwhelms.
Christopher Grant needs to work on his lines
Before even Jerry Lee Lewis resigns
At least Derek Keeling has every girl reeling
Lord, that voice is divinely benign
But Christopher Grant has to work on those lines
The audience came to see Elvis,
Yes, that audience came to see Elvis
But Kelly Lamont as Dyanne put a shame to her man,
She was just atmosphere, but then her song began
Yes, that audience stayed for Dyanne
The lighting was silly, it’s true
Yes, silly like strobe lights, it’s true
Sound design sounded just fine,
But lights went natural to Broadway without giving us a clue
Oh, the lighting was silly, it’s true
The mother humpin’-est thing that I’ve seen
Oh, The mother humpin’-est thing that I’ve seen
Martin Kaye as Jerry Lee looked just crazy to me,
Muffin-top hair, is there any joint to that knee?
The mother humpin’-est thing that I’ve seen
Derek Keeling played Cash like a god,
I said Derek Keeling played Cash like a god,
I’m guessing that maybe he’d smoked cigarettes as baby
Time for Elvis to stop, I’m not listening to a fraud,
I said Derek Keeling played Cash like a god.
The photo shoot at the end was a pleaser,
Yes, the photo shoot at the end was a pleaser,
Why not end the show? No, there’s Broadway to bestow
On the audience. Phillips monologue was a teaser,
And that photo shoot was a crowd pleaser.
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