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Why this Father's Day I may just send my kids to JCPenney to buy my whitey-tighties
Speaking of the Minnesota Marriage Amendment: As someone who buys one or two articles of clothing a year, I’m a clothes merchant’s nightmare. My son quit going shopping with me years ago because I spend my time complaining about the goofy crap they sell. And did you see the Christmas sales at Toys ‘R’ Us last July for stuff for Christmas 2013? I know it's never too early, but really?
Still, a guy does need his new whitey-tighties every few years. For the latest fashions I like to stroll the stylish aisles of Costco. The men's undergarment department is conveniently located across the aisle from the Edward Casket or 440-roll pack of Viva paper towels. Unfortunately, the undies at Costco come in packages of 18 dozen, and we’re short on storage space at our house.
The department store chain has responded to the hapless Million Mom boycott for hiring that admitted homo-thespian Ellen DeGenerate with a new Father's Day ad featuring—get this—a pair of dads playing with their kids.
Their own kids. As in, a couple playing with their kids.
Here's what the ad copy says:
First Pals: What makes Dad so cool? He’s the swim coach, tent maker, best friend, bike fixer and hug giver — all rolled into one. Or two.
Shocking, right? Next thing you know, they'll have TV commercials featuring--and I'm not making this up--real live African Americans selling stuff.