Cyn Collins's blog

Dear Cyn,

I ended a long-term relationship several months ago. Needless to say, it was hard. I'm starting to look at other relationships, but I want to take it slow and don't expect—or necessarily even want—lightning to strike overnight. So I'm looking at the prospect of a long winter of singlehood, and wondering, how should I handle the loneliness? I don't want to just grab some guy for a rebound, and I'll keep busy enough—but crowds can be lonely too. What's the healthiest way for me to get through this?

Dear Cyn—

A guy friend of mine is actively dating-and by "actively dating," I mean he's hooking up with multiple different people. Some he sees pretty regularly, others are one-night stands. My question is: what does he have to tell them, and when? I told him that before he hooks up with anyone, he has to tell her that he's seeing different people. He says he doesn't need to get into it unless someone asks him to be exclusive. What do you think?

Dear Cyn—

I'm 36, and my ten-year marriage ended last year. I'm getting ready to get back in the dating game, and I have a weird question: what kind of underwear should I wear? I've asked some female friends, and they're about evenly split between boxers and briefs. They told me to ask you what's hot on guys these days—and to ask if you have any tips for them (the women) while you're at it.

Dear Cyn,

There's a guy I've gone out with a couple of times; it's gone well, and I was looking forward to the next date when I saw that on Facebook he called a certain female politician with whom he seriously disagrees (for the record, so do I) the c-word. The one with four letters, used to insult a woman. I showed my friends, and they said to cut him off—any guy who would ever use that word is a sexist jerk. I'm not so sure-he's pretty outspoken, but that's one of the things I like about him. I'd rather he didn't go there, but I don't know if I'm ready to entirely write him off just because of it. What do you think?

Dear Cyn,

When people break up, they talk about how to split the couch, the cats, the CDs. But you never really hear about: how to split the hangouts, the music venues, art galleries, restaurants, bars? Who gets the Turf Club in the breakup? What's proper etiquette, if any, when you think you gotta see a show at your ex's fave digs when you know it'll cause them pain? How do you act when you plow through and go there? Should you be dismayed if she throws a drink in your face?